Wait loss, weight loss

Fat people are nice people - believe me, we really are!

I had a light-bulb moment today. I was sitting in the local take-away shop having my lunch. You know how it is... just a little Roast Pork role with gravy & apple sauce... oh yes, & I'll have the bits of crackling thanks.

Hmm - as I sat there enjoying (enduring?) my roll - I noticed something quite profound. Something that was actually very embarrasing, and something that - till today - I denied.

My stomach was resting on the table! Yep, can you believe it? My tummy actually occupied part of the table space? What's that all about? Yikes, talk about scary stuff!

I shouldn't be that surprised. Yesterday when I got on the scales, I was 138.8kg. That's like 2 regular people in one body.

I'm 178cm (5'10 - if you're into that). And 138.8kg (305.5lb). If you need some visuals, try stacking your shopping trolley with that much meat. It's big! Very big! Actually it's 4XL big if you go by regular men's clothing sizes.

So here I am, sitting in a take-away shop, eating a greasy and fatty roast pork roll. I don't even know why I did it. It's like a subliminal thing. I justified it at the time by saying "well it's just one".

Just one?

Really?

C'mon Pete - who are you kidding??? God (literally) only knows how many of these rolls I've had had in the past few months.

So there I am, sitting at the table, belly on show, pork roll in hand, reading the news paper. Charming thoughts hey? Oh & I had a Mother too. It must have been a wonderful sight to see a massive energy drink with the oh-so-charming image if a rolly-polly guy jammed between the built-in seat & table.

I looked around the shop and there was at least one other person in the same category as me. She had successfully poured herself between the seat and the table, and not only was her tummy on show - but so was her buxom chest.

She looked at me. I looked at her - and quickly looked away.

She looked again. I looked at her - but didn't quicly look away.

I stopped. And I realised that no doubt, whatever it was that got us both to that point, we both had to meet for a reason. I don't know if she felt the same (I suspect not) - but I realised through this life experience that something significant had to change.

I had to stop waiting for my weightloss.

I have to do something about it. Seriously - I mean, who wants to be nearly 40 and a prime candidate for heart surgery?

So I got up from the table, and went for a walk around the harbour. I'm fortunate that where I work - I have an amazing walking path around the park and harbour. I'll take some pictures so you can see - but it's simply stunning.

I didn't have an emotional response, though I have had one before. This time, I felt quite matter-of-fact. I just HAVE to do this. I get the feeling that my size is affecting a lot of things in my life. Not just my health, but a lot of other things too.

It's funny, people have an automatic response when they see a fat person. "Oh, you're looking healthy!" - "Wonderful to see you" (with arms outstretched trying to hug you). Then there is the other responses that people have in their mind "Lazy slob" - "Do something about your weight". "Oh my goodness!" No matter how politically correct you are, or which life-coaching seminar you've been to, or if you've had some mountain-top experience - you will have an opinion when you see a fat person. You do! Don't deny it.

So here I am.

I'm going to stop waiting for my loss. I'm going to embrace my weight-loss. I'm going to start from today. This day (Thursday 8th January 2009) is the day for change.

Let's see what happens in the coming weeks!